#ask honey mettaton

[underhoneyau]

Part 9: Question by: RedditUserissus

"hey mettaton do you still talk to blooky?"

Previous - Next

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

Underswap Sans & Papyrus character sheets (Updated version)

BLUE (Underswap Sans)

Backstory: Blue grew up happy and lacking nothing until his parents tragically died in a Core accident, leaving him to take care of his six-year-old brother all by himself at only fifteen. Hard worker, he still accepted the challenge, finding new creative ways to gain money, not all of them legal, but at the cost of his relationship with his brother. Blue never wanted to be a parent figure for Honey, and got overwhelmed quickly, which led his brother to meet the wrong people and, eventually, to be addicted to alcohol and cigarettes. Blue still feels guilty about this, even though Honey never considered him responsible, and it deeply affected his relationship with children. He doesn't want to be a father ever again, he's not good for it, and he doesn't want to be responsible for someone else again. Unfortunately, fate laughed at his face and threw Chara on the road. It didn't go well. Chara reset a lot of times, toying with the brothers and trying to manipulate them against each other, which Blue quickly understood. Most of the time though, he didn't have the opportunity to warn his brother since Chara killed him first… He knows that because he read it in a notebook Honey managed to save it from timeline to timeline. That's also in this notebook he realized Honey is actually really not doing well. The brothers managed to get out of there eventually, but they never forgave Chara. They don't remember what happened between timelines, but that notebook is kinda their guarantee Chara won't come and mess up their relationship again. On the surface, Blue engaged as the first monster police officer, with Alphys' approval, who continued to train him. It was a rough start though as the police officers really didn't want monsters around at first. But his energy and friendly face eventually won them over. He's trying to reach high ranks in the police hierarchy now.

Personality: Accessible - Active - Athletic - Caring - Challenging - Charismatic - Cheerful - Confident - Conscientious - Courageous - Creative - Curious - Daring - Dedicated - Dynamic - Efficient - Faithful - Friendly - Hardworking - Helpful - Heroic - Honest - Independent - Leaderly - Very loyal - Objective - Perfectionist - Playful - Protective - Reliable - Spontaneous - Ambitious - Competitive - Moralistic - Proud - Stubborn - Argumentative - Arogant - Fiery - Impulsive - Pretentious - Resentful - Research of adrenaline - Tendencies to put himself in danger - Hyperactive

Job: Police officer

Hobbies: All sorts of sports, hanging out with his friends, working for the Queen, solving neighborhood problems, trapping the house so Honey stops emptying the fridge during the nights.

Loves: Running, screaming, being loud, puzzles, his brother, competing with Alphys, promotions, people giving him high responsibilities, when people come to him to find ideas of fun activities to do, bitching on Karens, sweets, sugary foods, well-thought puns and jokes, messing with his brother's romantic life, gossiping with Toriel, driving BIG cars, drama movies.

Hates: Sitting for more than ten minutes, people who baby him, being in charge of children, Honey asking him to buy something when he's ten meters away from home and had the entire day to ask him, the office printer, pigs and all their relatives, having to chase criminals in dirty places, people picking him up because they can't resist his small size, being sick.

The S/O of his dreams: Someone active who can keep up with his energy, which is rare. Someone who is honest and has time to argue with him because he will argue on a lot of subjects.

Dealbreaker: Saying he's a bad father when he clearly said he wasn't feeling comfortable with being a dad, hurting his brother, baby him.

Contacts :

Family: Honey.

Best friends: Papyrus, US Alphys, US Undyne.

Close friends: Sans, UT Toriel, UT Undyne, UT Alphys, Pumpkin, Coffee, Salsa, Ink.

Friends: UT Mettaton, UT Grillby, UT Asriel/Flowey, Oak, Willow, Nugget, Copper, Chief, Nox, Moon, Sun, Rambo, Rumba, Sam, Ben, Delta.

OK/Neutral: UT Asgore, UT Muffet, UT Burgerpants, UT Gerson, Rus, Demon, Error.

Would better avoid: UT Frisk, UT Chara, UT Gaster, Red, Tango, Creeper, Fang, Killer, Dune.

Absolutely hates: Edge, Wine, Torpedo.

________________________________________

HONEY (Underswap Papyrus)

Backstory: Honey doesn't have many memories of his early childhood, he pretty much remembers only losing his parents and then Blue taking care of him the best he could. Unfortunately, fate wasn't nice to Honey as it gave him a hyper empathy that caused him troubles growing up. He cares for others so much that he struggled a lot to see the people he considered his friends during his teenage years were mainly with him because he could be easily manipulated. When he noticed, it was far too late as he fell into the hell of addictions and depression as no one really understood his way of seeing the world. Honey felt terribly lonely all the time he was Underground, to the point he developed tendencies to self-destruction, sabotaging himself because he had no self-confidence. It got worse after Chara fell as he had the brilliant idea to write his thoughts in a notebook he passed to himself through the timelines. It just led him to develop, added to everything, high anxiety that he couldn't get rid of, even after reaching the surface. The first thing he did once out of this hell was to find help for his addictions. His mind got blown the day he discovered what neurodivergent means and since he's slowly learning to understand himself better with his therapist. What really helped him though is finally finding people he could call friends and that actually cares about him. Honey is a very loyal friend and he's one of the most caring people ever, so he makes the best friends. Maybe, after all, all he needed to know was that he mattered all this time. He's doing way better now and discovers life again.

Personality: Benevolent - Caring - Cheerful - Compassionate - Cultured - Discreet - Dramatic - Hyperempathetic - Forgiving - Friendly - Generous - Gentle - Genuine - Honest - Hopeful - Humorous - Idealistic - Kind - Observant - Open - Optimistic - Organized - Patient - Peaceful - Perceptive - Prudent - Reliable - Romantic - Self-critical - Sensitive - Sentimental - Sweet - Tolerant - Trusting - Absentminded - Emotional - Anxious - Demanding - Dependant - Easily discouraged - Fearful (he faints to protect himself from big scares) - Lazy - Procrastinating - Reluctant to do new things - Attached to his routine

Job: Writer.

Hobbies: Art, cosplay, fanfictions, binge-watching movies and TV shows, reading a lot, playing video games, sharing his favorite pieces of media with his friends, making 5k words of theories essays on Tumblr, staying in bed four days in a row.

Loves: Talking about his hobbies, people who show interest in what he likes, DOGS, and PUPPIES, and CUTE ANIMALS, having the inspiration to write, screaming in tags on Tumblr when something excites him, hugs, attraction parks, his little routine, every time he realizes how much he feels better after a therapy session, hanging out with his friends, childish jokes, fake mustaches and glasses, goofing around.

Hates: Loneliness, the bad days he struggles to do anything, the blank page, when his brother argues for nothing, people wanting to drag him in things he didn't plan, going to new places without a warning, random people asking him random things in the street, when he can't listen to music in crowded places, being alone in crowded places, people telling "i will tell you later", phone calls, when Blue turns off the TV after calling him to have dinner twenty times, scary things, jumpscares, people scaring him just to watch him faint.

The S/O of his dreams: Just someone who cares and shows interest in what he likes is enough. Liking to hug for hours is a bonus.

Dealbreaker: Treating his anxiety like a joke, screaming at him for doing nothing when he struggles on bad days and can barely function, manipulate him, using his addictions against him, not being patient with him in general.

Contacts :

Family: Blue.

Best friends: US Undyne, Oak, Coffee, Rus, Ben.

Close friends: Sans, Papyrus, UT Toriel, UT Alphys, US Alphys, Willow, Pumpkin, Sam, Delta.

Friends: UT Undyne, UT Grillby, UT Muffet, Red, Edge, Copper, Chief, Moon, Sun.

OK/Neutral: UT Mettaton, UT Gaster, UT Burgerpants, UT Gerson, Rambo, Salsa, Rumba,

Would better avoid: UT Frisk, UT Chara, UT Asriel/Flowey, Nugget, Nox, Tango, Killer, Demon, Creeper, Fang, Ink, Error, Dune.

Absolutely hates: Wine, Torpedo.

[hotpinkboots]

~~~~~

~"System Overheat"~

(Pt. 1/2)

(Queen x Fem!Reader Oneshot)

THERE'S HARDLY ANY QUEEN FANFIC??? NOT on MY WATCH darlings this is not okay

Summary: Queen is delighted to see you at her party.

Note(s): Reader is said to be wearing a dress (specifically the dress that Orange Addison sells aka Mettaton's dress), reminder that Queen is like 7-8 freaking feet tall, Queen and (Y/N) are stupid as hell and in love, I only use a tiny bit of grammar for Queen so good luck, part 2 coming soon 🤭

How Long It Took To Write: 3 hours

~~~~~

"OHOOOOHOHOHOHO!"

Queen's boisterous laugh echoed down the hall. Swatchlings were bustling about, preparing food (which mostly consisted of battery acid pies, microchip salads, and spaghetti made of wires), and serving guests. Two Swatchlings had gasped at your beauty and insisted on walking you into the party, your arms linked snugly with theirs.

Other guests at the party wore nothing fancy. They all came as they were.

But not you.

You wore a beautiful periwinkle and sky blue gown. It felt cheap, slightly itchy, but it looked like it was worth millions. You felt glorious, you looked glorious. You were glorious. Heads turned as soon as the Swatchlings used their free hands to push open the large doors that lead into the Great Hall.

Queen, who had been in the middle of sipping from her fifth glass of battery acid, stopped everything she was doing to stare across the room at you. Her jaw dropped, her screen flashed a shocked "OMG", and she stood up abruptly. In doing so, she almost stepped on Nubert.

The Swatchlings unlinked their arms from yours to bow at the approaching Queen. Each then politely told you to enjoy the party, before they departed to help the others serve and clean. You waved goodbye to your escorts, then looked up as Queen's comically tipsy sounding voice spoke to you.

"(Y/N) Sweetie Honey Darling Gravy You Look Stunning"

"Lovely"

"Perfect, Even"

"..."

"In Fact You Are Stealing My Spotlight How Rude Of You" she prodded you in the arm playfully with her knuckle, so hard that she accidentally sent you stumbling backwards a step.

You gave a scoff of pure amusement, and quickly restabilized your balance. You opened your mouth to give a playful retort and a compliment to her in return, but you were unable to get a single word in before she started blabbering again. Even more delighted by her ridiculous ramblings, you humored her, and listened while she began going on and on about the most absurd things.

"Do You Happen To Be Lacking In Potassium Because I Ordered Bananas The Other Day And Meant To Type "5" But One Of The Tasques Jumped Onto The Keyboard And Accidentally Sent An Order For 5,936 Bananas. We Now Have 5,936 Bananas And I Do Not Know What To Do With Them. They Are Currently In Their Own Room Undergoing Professional Peeling"

"Did You See That New Swan Boat In The Free Pool That's Why I Asked About Your Favorite Bird The Other Day (But I Forgot So I Just Got The Swan Because Swans Are Pretty And You're Pretty Too)"

"Did You Notice That I Bought Myself New High Heels They Are The Exact Same As Every Other Pair I Own But Shinier. I Also Bought You A Pair So We Can Match- Oh Wait That Was Supposed To Be A Surprise LOL Dang (Damn)"

"Okay Enough About Me Let's Talk About You Have A Seat"

You blinked. All of her words had begun to mesh into one very long sentence that you hadn't been keeping up with, and before you knew it, you had absentmindedly walked across the long room with her, and now you were standing at the foot of her luxurious throne. Queen often invited you to sit with her on the throne. You usually perched on the armrest while the two of you went about spectating and playfully harassing people. This occurred so often that there was a slight dip in the armrest from your constant sitting on it.

Queen sat down and elegantly crossed her left leg over her right. She slung her arm around your waist to guide you to sit with her. With a bit of difficulty (due to how large the throne was), you made it to your usual spot, your legs neatly tucked under yourself. Queen reached her free hand over to smooth out your dress for you.

"Have I Told You That You Look Cool"

You grinned and nodded, leaning against her, a giddy feeling in your heart. Now that you could finally get a word in, you accepted the compliment. "Thank you!" You replied sweetly, "You look perfect, as usual, your Majesty," you replied in a frolicsome tone. Queen gave a pleased smile, lifting her glass to sip her battery acid. After a long sip, she looked at you again.

"Thank You Sweetie ILY-" she hiccupped, hand briefly pressing against her chest as she did. It was unclear if it was genuine or if she had done it to distract from the fact she said 'ILY' without thinking. She was never the type to shy away from showing over the top affection, but dropping "I love you" was different for her.

You just took it in a friendly way. "Love you, too!"

Queen's screen briefly flashed what looked like a keyboard smash.

~~~~~

Part 2 coming soon 👀 she's so silly fr darling I adore her terribly

Request Guidelines!

~Love, HotPinkBoots

Likes < Reblogs!

[throwmeabonepleaseandthankyou]

Introduction ~

Do you want your very own bones? Do you want multiple different types of bones?

You've come to the right place, here you can have all the bones you want!

If you're not sure what this means, look no further! I have the perfect explanation! It's.. It's a Undertale Headcanon account. I'm answering prompts you guys send in.

I also accept AUs! Here's a list of AUs + characters I will do(As well as the names I will refer them to) :

Undertale : Sans, Papyrus, Muffet, Grillby, Toriel, Mettaton... (More to be added) Underswap : Sans(Cobalt), Papyrus(Honey) Underfell : Sans(Red), Papyrus(Edge), Grillby, Mettaton Swapfell Purple : Sans(Nox), Papyrus(Rus) Fellswap Red : Sans(Cherry), Papyrus(Pup) Fellswap Gold : Sans(Wine), Papyrus(Coffee) Outertale : Sans(Moon), Papyrus(Sun), Grillby Horrortale : Sans(Oak), Papyrus(Willow) Reapertale : Sans(Crow), Papyrus(Dove) Dʁԍɑwꓕɑɼԍ : Dream, Nightmare X-Tale : Sans(Cross), Gaster, Mettaton, Muffet Some other unspecified AUs : Error, Ink, Fresh, Dust, Killer And maybe some others if you bring them up!

I ain't a very strict person, but I do ask you don't ask any asks that contain heavy gore or NSFW as to keep the blog sorta PG-13-ish for everyone. Also, try to keep your character selection at a maximum of 10(ten)! I am not a RP account, so any RP-like asks will be ignored and sent to the shadow realm. If you ask anything personal, depending on what they are, I might just answer them!

And that's it! Enjoy!

Oh, and also, refer to me as Woofers and with He/They!

[tooti-fruiti]

UNDERTALE BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND SCENARIOS

Their nicknames for you

-TORIEL

Dear/Dearest

Sweetheart/Sweetie

"Good morning dear, how did you sleep?"

"Hi sweetheart, how was your day?"

-SANS

(N/n)

Babe/Babes

Booger

(If you're a girl, he'll call you toots as well)

"sup (n/n), how you doing?"

"babe, have you seen my ketchup?"

"surprise booger."

"hey toots, nice to wake up to your pretty face"

-PAPYRUS

Papyrus doesn't give you any nicknames.

But if you ask him to give you one, he'll call you sweetheart.

"(Y/N)! CAN YOU HELP ME IN THE KITCHEN?"

"SWEETHEART, HAVE YOU SEEN MY SCARF?"

-UNDYNE

Babes

(N/n)

"BABES, GUESS WHAT?!"

"HEY (N/N), YOU READY TO GO?"

-ALPHYS

Alphys doesn't give you any nicknames

She tried to one time, but ended up embarrassing herself.

"H-Hey (Y/n)! L-Look at the new anime I f-found!"

"H-H-Hey m-m-muffincake...y-yeah I'm never doing th-that again, sorry."

-METTATON

Mettaton gives you all the name nicknames he gives everyone else, but he puts "my" in front of it, to make it exclusive to you.

"MY DARLING, CLOSE YOUR EYES. THIS NEW EYESHADOW IS PERFECT FOR YOU."

-ASGORE

Dear/Dearest

Honey/Hun

"I brought you some moew flowers, dear."

"Howdy honey, I made you some food."

-MUFFET

Muffet gives you the same nickname she gives everyone else.

Dearie.

But she will also call you by your name.

"Dearie! I have something for you!"

"(Y/n), some of my spiders are missing. Did you see where they went?"

-GRILLBY

Grillby doesn't give you any nicknames.

He just calls you by your name, or he won't call you anything.

"(Y/n), can you come here please?"

-GASTER

Darling

Dear/Dearest

"👎︎♋︎❒︎●︎♓︎■︎♑︎, ⬥︎□︎◆︎●︎♎︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎ ♑︎♓︎❖︎♏︎ ❍︎♏︎ ♋︎ ♒︎♋︎■︎♎︎ ◻︎●︎♏︎♋︎⬧︎♏︎✍︎?"

"👍︎□︎❍︎♏︎ ♒︎♏︎❒︎♏︎ 👎︎♏︎♋︎❒︎♏︎⬧︎⧫︎, ✋︎ ⬥︎♋︎■︎⧫︎ ⧫︎□︎ ⬧︎♒︎□︎⬥︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎ ⬧︎□︎❍︎♏︎⧫︎♒︎♓︎■︎♑︎"

[Translations: Darling, could you give me a hand here? (And) Come here Dearest, I want to show you something]

(Hope you enjoyed. Stay tuned for more and have a good day)

[deathdestructiondoom]

Snippets from my discord discussion with @honey-and-lemon-gt except I'm not giving any context.

Most are just random crap.

Yep that's me. You're probably wondering how i got in this situation.

Anyone with the same problem?

Plot twist : We were not talking about Akito if you're wondering.

air

Juni was replying to one of my message and i ain't showing it.

Indeed that is the true answer

Mettaton

Don't ask how we got to this point.

You should be scared @wistie

[papytonpropaganda]

Would you answer 47 und 65 (for Walls I guess ;} from the ask game if you're still up to it?

Also, in case you're celebrating it, Happy Halloween! 🎃🎃🦇

aw thank you, a belated happy halloween to you too!!

47. Is there a trope that you’ve written before but are now sick of?

hmmmm, not really tbh. at most I could say, those times when I've written a lot of fluff one-shots in a short period of time, I sometimes get a bit tired of that and long for Walls-caliber angst, haha.

65. If you wrote a sequel to [insert fic], what would happen in it?

oh honey believe me, Walls is gonna have sequels. generally speaking they're actually not as Papyton-focused, but Papyrus and Mettaton are very important characters regardless. I'm really excited to get to what Pixie and I have planned!

[zelphin124]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOO I can't believe I missed that I completely forgot the concept thingggggg and I had planned to give a different concept to every person I asked that tooooooo man uhhhhh ima just say based on a zinnia flower (ah I'm an idiot now to try and fix all my mistakes)

It's all good! Oo! a Zinnia flower~

*insert quick google search here*

RIGHT, SO- going off of question number 8, in the UTMV, let's veer away from the Sanses real quick... Hear me out: Zinnia!Alphys!

Zinnia!Alphys is not a regular Alphys. She's still quiet and nervous, but she studies honey- and different kinds of honey. She also studies colors. She's an assistant to Zinnia!Mettaton with fashion because of her expertise on colors!

Zinnia!Alphys is pink like most zinnia flowers, and her spikes are incredibly flakey like that on the flower. Her eyes are a flakey yellow and her glasses are water droplets! She has a yellow and orange striped dress that's held together by a sticky honey she invented. She also loves to do her nails.

Zinnia!Undye has a fascination with bees and flowers, so when Zinnia!Alphys can, she tries to design a colorful bouquet for her friend, and they love to frolick in snowdin where tons of bluebells grow. Zinnia!Alphys her real love interest is the brave and gentle knight of the royal guard, Zinnia!Papyrus.

And quite possibly, Zinnia!Alphys has to team up with Zinnia!Toriel and Zinnia!Asgore to stop the villianous duo, Zinnia!Sans and Zinnia!Muffet.

That's all I got for now! Thank you for the idea! It was fun to play with!

[askct]

Hey Mettaton, why the yelling? Surely you know you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.

sorry, I was being dramatic, and....hah? But, thank you for the ask, darling.-mtt

[ivyprism]

Aldrich: That’s great, love.

Cyrus moves Morgan off to the side. Kioko is shaking still and is curled up in a ball.

Cyrus: I don’t think Kioko sees this Dolce as a threat. It’s more likely his actions unintentionally triggered something.

Morgan: What are you implying…?

Cyrus: You and I both know the answer to that.

Morgan sighs.

Morgan: And I thought that they didn’t have any problems.

———

N: When you’re done with blocking those numbers, do you want to exchange numbers?

Astrea: This is... Rather intriguing. But concerning.

-------

Hydrangea: I don't mind... But there are a lot of them.

[transprincemlmw]

Halloween- What’s the best costume that you’ve ever had? 

Oh, you asked my favorite question on the list, mon ami~ Because I'm a cosplayer, there's a LOT to choose from >:3

The BEST is probably my Musical Mettaton cosplay, I'll admit the makeup wasn't the BEST, but I'm really limited because of skin allergies to pretty much all costume makeup, so I can't just use silver facepaint and call it a day, I have to take 28 billion extra steps to get a sub-par result. I've gotten better in quarantine at it, just, ya know... Don't have cons to wear it at. Pics from 2 different cons, with the last one being the better one, obviously

The dress train is, like, 3 feet behind me, and it's REALLY fucking GORGEOUS when I'm walking in the dress

But I, however, DID enter in a cosplay contest with my Majora's Mask Link cosplay.

This was back when I was, God, I think I was 16 here? I've outgrown all but the bunny hat, so I have to rebuild it sometime. I remember my dad was NOT happy with how short I made the tunic, but I still was bound and determined to be as accurate as I could with my $25 budget /srs, I didn't get an allowance, so I was limited on moolah

My most POPULAR, so far, has been my namesake, Honey-senpai from OHSHC! People ADORE it when I dress up as him, and I've actually been gifted sweets in this cosplay!

Regular Mettaton EX is very popular as well, especially when I bring my bedazzled chainsaw and my brother dresses up as Burgerpants. I really gotta fix that chainsaw, it's fallen into SUCH disrepair.

Those are probably my best ones, but that may be subject to change, though, I'm currently building 2 of them, Joker from Persona 5 (the coat flows SO gayly in the wind and I adore it so much, I'm REALLY looking forward to that one, it makes me SO gender euphoric because thiefcore, and I don't even have all parts yet), and Spamton from Deltarune: Chapter 2!

Side note, a very DISTANT goal is a cosplay for my Linksona, who is a prince, but my arthritis makes it difficult to embroider, and the gold accents make it kinda necessary, and I have NO idea how I'll do his fucked up little knee guards. But it'd look very cool because princecore, even if no one will have at clue who the hell I'm cosplaying (if you see the second cape to the left, he has 2 designs, one for ceremonial purposes, and one for everyday purposes, but I don't really wanna cosplay the ceremonial one and have people think I'm just doing genderswapped Zelda)

[ratsoh-writes]

When life gives you lemons…

Sans: you give life ketchup. It’s called bartering.

Papyrus: you make lemonade to share with your friends!! Then ask life for more lemons cause that stuff was nice!

Star: you use the lemons as target practice for your gun, then regret your life decisions when you realize your little bro could’ve made lemon bars.

Honey: dunno? Make lemon bars? Is this a trick question?

Red: you throw them at the neighbors dogs who won’t stop barking at 3am

Edge: you make lemonade and refuse to share with anyone. Especially not dirty *ss brothers who can’t clean up their own dishes

Mal: you dry them out to make a nice cleaner for your kitchen counter

Cash: you peel it like an orange and offer “orange slices” to your friends

Oak: you leave it on your desk and forget about it for two weeks

Willow: you sprinkle a little sugar on top and have it with your morning crepe! Delicious!

Charm: you eat that sucker raw because of a dare.

Sugar: you leave them in the fruit bowl on the kitchen, then go on a shopping spree for more fruits cause the lemons looked lonely

Lord: you debate squeezing one right on your nosy *ss friends pristine white shirt, then remember you actually like said friend

Mutt: you feed a slice to your baby raccoon, tape it, and get her famous on the undernet

Wine: you dry out some slices and put them in decorative candles.

Coffee: you give them to your brother. Who needs lemons these days?

Pop: you feed them to the eels in the creek behind the power plant .

Rhythm: you make a lovely strawberry lemonade for your students! They practiced hard and deserve the treat!

Pluto: you cross breed them with a magical plant to see if you can create a new crop staple, then you get bored and move on to a new interest

Jupiter: you give them to star cause he ran out of lemons for target practice

G: you reject the lemons and demand oranges instead

Green: you politely accept and immediately begin making a thank you letter for life’s generosity. You and life are now pen pals

Peaches: you plant the seeds and grow a lemon empire! Mwahahahahah

Rancher: you throw them at the gosh dang crows who won’t stay out of your field

Snipe: you shoot life. How did you get into my house???

Bruiser: you squeeze the juice into your enemies eyes.

Ace: you leave a lemon on life’s doorstep every morning, then their car, then their desk, then their bedroom pillow. Life spirals into insanity. Just as they’re being carted to the inane asylum, you leave one last lemon in their cell

Slim: you make a poorly timed wattpad “lemon” joke

Butch: you squeeze the juice into your enemies open wounds

Boss: you put the lemon slices on the fish you’re grilling (and flick the juice into your enemies eyes)

Lilac: you are older and wiser, so you leave one lemon aside before using the rest as target practice. But it was all for naught. Your brother needed two lemons to make the lemon bars

Basil: you make lemon bars, but you don’t question why. Life is too short for questions

Rust: you resist the urge to feed the lemons to your kids

Noir: you feed the lemons to rusts kids and laugh at their little scrunched faces

Lush: you resell the lemons as organic for twice the price even though they’re literally just normal lemons

Pepper: you make a lovely face mask to bleach your bones with

Sparks: you squeeze a little lemon juice in your water then act like you’re a fancy actor all day

Salt: you hide your lemons from your psychotic friends

Gears: you enchant the lemons into lemon mettaton. It goes up in flames in two minutes. Dammit

Compass: you sleep with the lemon next to your pillow cause it smells nice :)

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

Where would the boys take their girl/boyfriend on a first date?

Undertale Sans - Somewhere a bit fancy because his brother yelled at him because he wanted to just invite you home and hang out. You're in one of Mettaton's excentric restaurants, and you're so awkward as Mettaton clearly didn't get the hint and flirts with you the whole time, trying to separate you from Sans by throwing money at his face so he goes do a comedy show on the scene or something. That's not a very good first date, but with time, you found it hilarious.

Undertale Papyrus - He brings you along to a marathon. Ok, maybe it's because he loves marathons and didn't think that maybe you don't like running. At least he is nice, he waits for you when you are struggling after only ten minutes. It's not your best memory. Papyrus figures you're not the sportive type after that and decides more chill dates will do.

Underswap Sans - He drags you to see a cool cave near the beach. It was fun and cute until the sea level turns up and you both had to hold your breath to not drown as you're waiting for the rescuers. The rescuers said that there were signs all around them asking to not enter this cave. Blue didn't tell them he kinda destroyed them all to not waste the moment...

Underswap Papyrus - Comic con time! You're having a great time waiting in queues for hours to see your favorite celebrities for three minutes! Except you didn't see any because you fainted midway because of how hot it was in the queue and had to be evacuated, yeah. Eh, at least your favorite celebrity carried you to the infirmary even if you didn't see it because you passed out. Honey took a photo of you two for the memories. It's, uh, not the best day.

Underfell Sans - Edge convinced him to have their first date in a zoo and gave them an address. Except it's not a zoo. It's a farm. And not the best of them. There's poop everywhere, you got attacked by an angry goat and Red lost his left hand inside a pig's mouth and had to wait for several hours for the pig to reject it. You both decided to never talk about this date ever again.

Underfell Papyrus - Classic restaurant. He's a very classic guy. It went all well until you choke on a piece of bread and almost die. Thank god your knight in shining armor is here to help! He does the Heimlich maneuver on you and saves you. You also vomit all over his nice suit and he broke two of your ribs. You end the night at the hospital with Edge assuring you it's alright and you both dying of shame and pain in the bed. This is fine.

Horrortale Sans - He promised you he would show you the Underground, so he takes you there. You... Uh... Didn't expect to teleport right in front of human corpses in advanced rotting state. Uh... That's awkward. It becomes even more awkward when after walking in Snowdin you walk in one of Willow's old trap and suddenly find yourself hanging upside down by the ankle to a tree. After that, Oak decides maybe it's best to just hang out in his farm. You never were so happy to see their farm again.

Horrortale Papyrus - He wants to prove you he's not an old man and still has the moves, so he takes you to a nightclub. Both of you realize it's a mistake the second you see everyone in there is naked. To be honnest, neither of you knew naturist nightclubs were a thing. You decide to go watch a movie instead and never talk about that ever again.

Swapfell Sans - You're excited when he invites you to the museum. Well, that is before you realise it's a historical torture museum with a lot of machines and weird tools to hurt and cut pieces of people. Nox is very exciting though and he insists you try to stick your head in the big guillotine and tries the big seat to drown witches. He doesn't understand why you're not that enthusiast about all this. Clearly his idea was better than yours!

Swapfell Papyrus - He bought 2 million rubber duckies and filled his room with it. You sure didn't expect this. Rus screams to you he is hidden in the duckies and that if you want to hang out, you need to find him. You did, but at what cost. As soon Nox comes home, he is screeching hysterically that you have an hour to clean everything or he kills the both of you. You spend the rest of the day and night cleaning Rus' room with him in silence. Awkward.

Fellswap Gold Sans - You went to a medieval festival. It was lovely until Wine drunk a little too much wine and decided to fight you in duel with real swords in front of a very exciting crowd that thought you were just two actors having fun. You spend your afternoon running in circles and begging people for help as they all laugh at you. It ends when Wine finally passes out after one more too much glass. You drag the skeleton home as he's singing salacious songs out loud.

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - You went to a trampoline park, and it was so nice! Until Coffee tries to impress you by doing a triple jump and falls out of the trampoline on the cold concrete floor, almost breaking his neck. You spend the rest of the day screaming at the people who own the place for the lack of safety, and then argue the rest of the night with Wine who won't let go of the fact you attempted to kill his brother. And then Coffee keeps crying, saying he is sorry he is an idiot, and you tell him he is not an idiot and now has to comfort him. Your headache is atrocious.

[coolpapyton95]

Calm in the Storm

Series: Undertale LGBT Pride Month 2017, Part 1 Rating: G Words: 549 Warnings: none Relationship: Papyrus x Mettaton Read on AO3

Thunderstorms are one of Papyrus's worst fears. Fortunately, he doesn't have to face them alone. 

---------

Papyrus shuddered as harsh rain beat against the windows. He was cocooned in all the blankets on Mettaton’s bed, trying to shield himself from the howling midnight thunderstorm outside. He flinched at every flash of lightning and curled up more tightly at every crack of thunder.

Since moving to the surface, Papyrus had figured out one of his worst fears. He had never experienced a weather system so loud and overwhelmingly large in the Underground, and every sound was murder on his overly-sensitive hearing. Normally he would retreat to the basement of his house and put on his headphones until it was over, but Mettaton’s penthouse didn’t have a basement, and Papyrus hadn’t brought his headphones.

Mettaton was asleep next to him. Papyrus wanted so badly to wake him for comfort, but he didn’t want to disturb his boyfriend so late at night.

That ended up not mattering, however, since the next crash of thunder shook the entire apartment complex, scaring the robot right out of sleep mode.

He blinked, staring around confusedly until he saw Papyrus sobbing with anxiety. “Papy, dearest, what’s wrong? Is it the storm? Why didn’t you wake me up?” he demanded alarmedly, sitting up and taking the skeleton’s face in his hands.

Papyrus wiped his eyes fruitlessly. “I-I’m sorry, Metta, I just—it’s all too much and I didn’t want to bother you when you had a long day at work today and needed rest—”

“Oh, darling, please, it isn’t a bother at all to help you.” Mettaton kissed his forehead. “I’ll fix this for you somehow, baby. Hold on.”

Mettaton turned on the bedside table lamp and looked around hurriedly for a solution to the problem. He spotted his walk-in closet door. What was it Alphys had once said about fabrics and clothes? That they could help deaden noise, that was it! “Come here, honey,” he whispered soothingly as he pulled Papyrus out of the blankets. He kept his arms around his boyfriend as he led him into the closet and sat him in the corner amongst his clothing. “Stay here a minute.”

Papyrus was perplexed and frightened, but he listened. He watched as Mettaton dragged in the pillows and sheets from their bed and made some sort of nest out of them on the floor. Then the robot brought in his computer and turned on some gentle jazz music.

Papyrus crawled into the blanket nest as Mettaton shut the door tight and dimmed the lights so the room was softly illuminated.

“How is this, Papy?” Mettaton asked as he dropped down next to him.

“S’lovely,” Papyrus murmured faintly, his fear already fading away. The clothes in the closet really did help to cushion the sounds outside, and he could no longer see the cruel bolts of lightning that forewarned of torture to his eardrums.

“Would you like to watch something, or talk, or just sleep?”

“Just—just sleep, I think.”

Mettaton scooted under the blankets and pulled Papyrus flush against him, the skeleton’s head resting on his chest. Papyrus focused on the gentle hum and soothing vibration of the robot’s metal body until he could hear nor feel anything else.

“Thank you for everything, Mettaton,” he whispered.

Mettaton kissed his skull once more. “Anything for you, dearest. I’m always here for you.”

[non-bionical-mecha-dude]

FANDOMS, CHARACTERS, HEADCANNONS, ONE SHOT, FANFICS, RULES & STUFF

Hello! Sorry if this is messy, I just wanted to lay down some ground rules! If you have any questions or asks, then feel free to let me know!

ALSO, KEEP IN MIND, I HAVE ADHD, AND I OFTEN FORGET SOCIAL MEDIA EXISTS, AND MAY DISAPPEAR RANDOMLY. IF YOU DECIDE TO REQUEST SOMETHING, PLEASE UNDERSTAND, IT MAY TAKE ME A LONG WHILE, I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE AND THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE!!

Undertale/Deltarune

Sans

Papyrus

Alphys

Undyne

Temmie (PLATONIC ONLY)

Muffet

Toriel (PLATONIC ONLY)

Asgore (PLATONIC ONLY)

Mettaton

Napstablook (PLATONIC ONLY)

Flowey (PLATONIC ONLY)

Frisk and Chara (PLATONIC ONLY)

Annoying dog/toby (PLATONIC ONLY)

Kris

Susie

Ralsei

Lancer (PLATONIC ONLY)

Noelle

Birdly

Roulx Kard

Seam

Jevil

Queen

Swatch

Spamton

Tasque Manager

The Addisions

Dream Daddy

Robert

Damien

Craig

Hugo

Mat

Amanda (PLATONIC ONLY)

Detroit become human

Ralph

Connor

RK900

Markus

Gavin

North

Stardew Valley

Literally all of the bachelors

Penny

Abigail

Resident Evil Village

Alcina Demitrescu

Karl Heisenberg

Donna Beneviento

Overwatch

Hanzo Shimada

Genji Shimada

Cole Cassidy (Mcree)

Gabriel Reyes (Reaper)

Lucio Correia Dos Santos

Mei

Hana Song (D.Va)

Ashe

Lena Oxtan (Tracer)

Bastion (ONLY PLATONIC)

Jack Morrison (Soldier 76)

My Hero Academia

Katsuki Bakugou

Shoto Todoroki

Izuku Midoriya

Tenya Iida

Denki Kaminari

Ejirou Kirishima

Ochako Uraraka

Tamaki Amajiki

Togata Mirio

Toga Himiko

Mina Ashido

Shota Aizawa

Eri (PLATONIC ONLY)

Ouran Highschool Host Club

Tamaki

Kyoya

Hikarou

Haruhi

Kaoru

Mori

Honey (PLATONIC ONLY)

Seven deadly sins

Ban

King

Gowther

Diane

Gilthunder

Meliodis

Merlin

Dereri

Escannor

Toilet Bound Hanako-Kun

Hanako-Kun

Yashiro

Mistuba

Kou

Tsukagimori

Tsukasa

Aoi Akane (the time keeper)

DeathNote

Mello

L

Light

Misa

Mitsuba

Near (PLATONIC ONLY)

Seduce me the Otome

James

Erik

Sam

Matthew

Damien

Malik

Diana

Harry Potter

Harry Potter

Ronald Weasley

Hermione Granger

Draco Malfoy

Professor Snape

Tom Riddle

FNAF Security Breach (ALL PLATONIC ONLY)

Sunrise/Moondrop

Glamrock Freddy

Montgomery Gator

Glamrock Chica

Roxanne Wolf

DJ Music Man/tiny music man

Wet floor sign bots

Map bot

LotR/Hobbit

Bilbo

Thorin

Tauriel

Thranduil

Legolas

Sam-Wise

Mary

Pip

Aragorn

Gimli

Fili

Kili

Bard

Gladriel

Arwen

TMNT 2012

Donatello

Raphael

Leonardo

Mikey

Splinter (PLATONIC ONLY)

ROTTMNT

Donatello

Raphael

Leonardo

Mikey

April O'Neil

Big Mama

TMNT Bayverse

Leo

Raph

Donnie

Mikey

April

Vern

Mr. Sacks

Casey Jones

Hellboy (2004-2008)

Hellboy

Abe Sapien

John Myers

Johann Krauss

Liz Sherman

Prince Nadja

Princess Nuala

✨Lego Monkie Kid✨

MK

Mei

Red Son

Tang

Sun Wukong

Macaque

Ao Lie

Azure Lion

Spider Queen

✨Sparkles✨ mean I'm currently hyperfixating on this topic at the moment and will have a higher chance of writing for this/these one('s)

While these are not all the fandoms I'm in, these are the ones I'm most comfortable with writing about

Some rules:

I may or may not write smut? I'm not sure since I haven't really done it, but I will NOT write smut for characters under the age of 21

I won't write anything that has to do with the reader being super OP or being half of like, literally everything

When it comes to Y/N being an anthropomorphic animal/human or half of that, if stuff like that is canon in the fandom, then I'll write it (like a half human half monster for Undertale, or a Cat person for TMNT) but if stuff like that just doesn't exist in that world, then I most likely won't write it

I won't write a character being a racist, rapist, homophobic, transphobic or anything like that, those things are fucked up and aren't ok and that character I may write, might be someone else's comfort character and I don't want to ruin a character for someone

I won't write a character as being an abuser, sure, I could say they where abused some way in the past if it is relevant to the fic, but I will not write a character being an abuser themselves, that's just not right

I won't write yandere characters, it just feels to toxic to me to have someone be THAT possessive of someone

If a character is canonically underage, I will not age them up, if a reader or character is being romantically shipped with the underage character, the reader/character must and will be underage as well

(Keep in mind I might add rules or change certain rules)

I can do:

LGBTQ+(THIS ABSOLUTELY INCLUDES ASEXUAL AND AROMANTIC)

Any gender for reader, if not specified, I shall do gender neutral

I will write angst and mental health related topics of asked

I will absolutely 100% write a character or reader with ADHD and other neurodiversities

I can do shipping fanfics! Although, it depends on the characters, but I may be able to write it, even if I don't entirely agree with the ship! AS LONG as it is not anything like AbuserXvictim or MinorXadult or anything like that.

As a writer, I hope that I may advance in my writing skills, as well as have fun with what I write, so, I ask as many requests as your heart's desire!

Remember, I have every right as a writer to deny a request if I'm not comfortable with writing it.

HAVE A GREAT DAY YOU BEAUTIFUL/HANDSOME BITCHES, BROS AND BO BURNHAM HOES! (See what I did there?)

[askfriskandcompany]

How dozs the crew drink their coffee/tea/hot beverage of choice? (Like how much sugar/milk/cream...)

Frisk prefers tea with lots of milk and sugar, or coffee with milk, sugar, and hot cocoa packet. If it’s coffee then the milk will take up more room than the coffee.

Chara prefers black tea, often extra bitter. They will also happily drink black coffee or coffee with one hot cocoa packet.

Asriel likes gentle teas with honey as a sweetener. He prefers tea over coffee, and with coffee he likes to have a very specific amount of coffee, milk, and sugar to achieve ideal flavor balance.

MK prefers coffee over tea and usually goes for very bitter iced coffee. Iced because it works better with straws, and won’t burn you if you spill it. They don’t mind sugar in the coffee, but dislike when the coffee itself isn’t coffee-tasting enough, so when ordering at a coffee shop they may ask to add an extra shot of espresso. Luckily caffeine doesn’t seem to have any noticeable effects on non-boss monsters.

Toriel likes herbal teas such as chamomile for its soothing smell. She drinks coffee mostly for its caffeine, which she as a boss monster can feel the effects of. She adds a little cream or milk to coffee, but very little sugar if any.

Asgore of course likes Golden Flower Tea, but also any similar floral-smelling teas, as well as matcha and oolong. Black tea is his least favorite tea but he’ll still happily drink it. He doesn’t care much for coffee.

Sans isn’t exactly much of a gourmet but he’s been learning to appreciate the subtle aroma of freshly brewed tea, mostly because its something Toriel likes and he wants to appreciate things she’s interested in. He also likes coffee and prefers his specifically with hot cocoa and those weird dehydrated marshmallows that sometimes come in hot chocolate packets but you can also buy them separately in a little dispenser. He sometimes just eats those raw.

Papyrus prefers warm milk. Very healthy. Good for your bones.

Alphys developed a taste for matcha and matcha-flavored things after her trip to Japan.

Undyne likes hot teas. She usually defaults to plain black teas but will also go for chai if it’s available. She will add sugar but usually forgoes the milk or cream.

Gaster likes tea more than coffee.

Hermann likes coffee more than tea.

Mettaton drinks motor oil and glitter.

Napstablook drinks ghost tea.

-TQ